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| Imagine that in your face at 2:00 a.m. |
When the big snowstorms come, I can cope with not being able
to leave the house and run errands to the vets, or to the bank (always
important), or to get groceries - mainly
pet food, because the only crisis we ever really have is being awakened by two hungry
angry cats fighting at two o’clock in the morning. The things that they could do to us in the
dark while we sleep, I hesitate to think about.
On the most recent snowiest of the snowy days, my Internet
connection went stone cold dead.
I can’t be cut off from the world.
I receive wholesale orders for cheese through e-mail, and do
some of our marketing that way, too. I read the news online, and check the latest
weather reports from my computer dashboard. (How else can I find out if the sun
will shine tomorrow?)
I also get lots of good information from the Vermont State website
–I find what I am looking for about 85% of the time, and sometimes even contact
the correct person on the first try.
The most recent ‘reach out and touch’ with VT was regarding the
renewal of my retail meat-sellers license.
I had sent a check, but received no papers. Thirty days later, I opened a finger-wagging
letter stating that because I overpaid the fee by ten dollars and neglected to
sign the form, they were returning everything.
Whatever! Why hasn’t
the State put meat and cheese renewals online so that we can get this annual
dance over with in clean keystrokes and a credit card number?
(Sounds of crickets chirping.)
Gosh, I’ve gone off subject pretty quickly. There may have been too much berry jam on my morning
pancakes giving me the sugar shakes, or lingering negativity over having to cut
that second check.
After sitting on the floor and re-booting the satellite’s
modem over and over for several hours, attempting to funnel the power of one
woman’s wishful thinking into the box and force it to blink pretty pretty blue lights,
I called a repairman.
Not that I actually believed one would come, what with all the
drifting snow and school cancellations, but as soon as the sides of the road
became visible, I wanted to be first on the list.
Whadda ya know? Wishful thinking works! The repairmen had another job and could stop here
on the way, but only if the driveway was clear.
Dan! Skidsteer! Done!
And if this story seems familiar, it’s because the same
thing happened 2 years ago! March. Modem
down. Desperate attempts to mystically regain access to LOLCats.com.
The repair-truck manifested out of nowhere, they quickly got
the dish working again, and disappeared back into the whiteout. Knights of Chivalry they were, not to mock us,
because the problem was:
snow on the dish.
Service call $85.
Apparently, happiness does have a price.
